please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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