check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
