I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
He passed out mid-signature
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
True strength comes from lack of pants
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize