she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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