You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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