apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
