:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
