Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
