dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Randomize
