i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Randomize
