My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
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