$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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