Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Randomize
