ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Randomize
