Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
