Texts From Last Night

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  (772): View more from Florida

  What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?

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  (772): What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous? http://tfl.nu/ray0
  Replies (14) Good night (1300) Bad night (2671)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed

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  (847): my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed http://tfl.nu/8ny3
  Replies (33) Good night (622) Bad night (3555)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.

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  (814): Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade. http://tfl.nu/7055
  Replies (49) Good night (1591) Bad night (7750)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.

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  (240): I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards. http://tfl.nu/evpw
  Replies (17) Good night (1680) Bad night (5263)
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  (450): View more from Quebec

  I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...

  (450): View more from Quebec

  On that note, do I have a rule?

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  (450): I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc... (450): On that note, do I have a rule? http://tfl.nu/u1td
  Replies (15) Good night (4917) Bad night (1197)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.

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  (306): Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight. http://tfl.nu/dfco
  Replies (33) Good night (1903) Bad night (4994)
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.

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  (414): My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with. http://tfl.nu/07fq
  Replies (158) Good night (2722) Bad night (12740)
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  (631): View more from New York

  lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon

  (1-631): View more from New York

  wow.

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  (631): lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon (1-631): wow. http://tfl.nu/6n98
  Replies (20) Good night (4899) Bad night (1691)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.

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  (608): Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage. http://tfl.nu/zk4v
  Replies (9) Good night (1210) Bad night (2694)
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.

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  (479): If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough. http://tfl.nu/qsaq
  Replies (12) Good night (3265) Bad night (858)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.

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  (843): I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs. http://tfl.nu/k4hm
  Replies (11) Good night (1209) Bad night (2065)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"

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  (919): you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches" http://tfl.nu/j1kh
  Replies (2) Good night (981) Bad night (480)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.

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  (+44): It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution. http://tfl.nu/zvzs
  Replies (2) Good night (563) Bad night (322)
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  (585): View more from New York

  You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.

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  (585): You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe. http://tfl.nu/6475
  Replies (2) Good night (799) Bad night (326)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Did you run away?

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I DANCED AWAY.

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  (615): I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat (615): And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing (203): Did you run away? (615): I DANCED AWAY. http://tfl.nu/ipjx
  Replies (2) Good night (1008) Bad night (480)

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