At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
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You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
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I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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