Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
