Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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