summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
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