I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
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