I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
That was an excessively violent trivia night
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
