so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
