Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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