mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
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