I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
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