Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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