Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Randomize