I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
He? As in you personified your dick?
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Randomize
