ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
