he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
