apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Randomize
