I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
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