Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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