But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
did you get engaged???
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
