I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
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And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
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Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
im on a boat
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