I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
