umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Randomize
