There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
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