It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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