why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Less talking, more tequila
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
