Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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