We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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