so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
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