Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
Randomize
