it wasn't lemon gatorade
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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