am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
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