i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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