he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
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