Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize